Friday, May 8

Mother's Day Eve, Eve

I am so excited for Mother's Day....why you ask? Well, I get to talk to my baby boy in New Zealand......I will finally get to hear if he has developed an accent.....everyone keeps asking me if he has and I laugh at them because for some reason I can only read/see his letters, I haven't developed the skill of 'hearing' a letter....

Mother's Day
I usually think Mother's Day is a big bunch of hooey....no, not when it's about my Mom and the moms in my life, but when it is about me. Don't get me wrong, I love the presents and adoration, but I hate the feeling of failure, and underachievement when I think of myself in the glowing terms that are tossed out in abundance about me this one day....
I think most mothers feel this way. .....as a mother you are supposed to love your family, you are supposed to encourage and support them, you are supposed to nurture them, you are supposed to put your family before you, you are supposed to you are supposed to cook dinner, clean the house, have the laundry done, be the chauffeur, the gardener, the best friend and the whipping post, the centerfold of the June Clever Monthly, etc.....
On Mother's Day we feel a sense of underachievement when we compare ourselves to the glowing icons most children make their mothers out to be........I wasn't home everyday after school with a home baked treat. I didn't make them play the piano. I didn't keep them home form school just for fun. My child didn't get into an Ivy League school. Etc...,etc...etc....
So why all the guilt, and the hate of Mother's day in regards to our selves?
I think that this comes because we all know that there are times when we don't particularly act in ideal mom like ways. We think we must be superhuman, we have this need to be perfect in always and at all times. We look at ourselves as failures to our children because we didn't have the socks matched or bake them cookies?......It is crazy!
We don't expect this mom like perfection out of anyone else, so why do we expect it out of ourselves? Why do we get hung up on the things we don't do, the things we haven't become perfect at, 'ideals' that are out of our control?
If we really looked at the Mom things we do in life, we would realize that we do the right mom things more often than not. We can only be our self. We can't be and shouldn't try to fit into the mold of another mom....We all have our own abilities, gifts and strengths. We are powerful wonderful women.
So this year for for Mom's day I think I will cut myself some slack and enjoy the adoration. I will I will enjoy the day. I will be a happy mother and not dwell on the negative...if one of your children acted moody and had these feeling you would give them a pep talk and tell them not to dwell on the negative. You would remind them of how truly great they really are..... Because it is Mother's Day I will be happy with the messes made in my honor. My heart will be touched with the macaroni card, odd gifts, and flowery words that I receive. I will act like a mom is supposed to act everyday even if I have to do things I don't want to do and hear things that may make me uncomfortable. I am the best mom I know how to be and that is good enough! My Family loves me for me.

...and to My wonderful Mother and all my surrogate mothers out there...Thank you, for being your most wonderful selves. You are all remarkable. You have the power!
My gift to you this year ..... I will try to be more grateful for the everyday things you do for me, everyday. I will try to be more vocal to you about the gratitude I feel for you, maybe that way Mother's Day won't bee such a shock to your system. You are all such great examples of motherhood to me.
....now, you all cut yourselves some slack and enjoy the day. Find happiness in the doing the mom things. Take a little comfort knowing that someday, somewhere there will be a child extolling your virtues and making some other mother wish she were more.....You are the best, you are a mother and you have a great power.
MCC

No comments: